Phraseology You Don't See Every Day.

This is from a Yahoo! news story, emphasis mine:

Although she quit school as a young woman to perform on stage, Travis enlisted in college in the 1980s and graduated Phi Beta Kappa from the University of Oklahoma in 1992.

Maybe there's still hope for American Higher Education. Here's the link to the article.

Hey, At Least I Waited For John-Paul To Be Buried.

The College of Cardinals will now need to select a new Pope. It's unlikely an American will be named due to Iraq, our approach to reproduction, and our nation's generally secular nature.

And you know, that's OK. There are far more devout Catholics in the third world who need the help of the church more than we do.

Anyway, who needs a Pope Pedophile I .

Stuff it Buffett

Jimmy Buffett has cultivated his laid back, live and let live persona for as long as I can remember. But a few years back a local band that did covers of his songs had the temerity to call themselves the "Parrotheads". Somehow this transgression was discovered by Buffett or one of his minions and the band was enjoined to cease and desist. Now the same fate has occurred to a band named "Parrotville".

Well, Mr. live and let live, you're a freakin' hypocrite. Why not trademark "Parrotburgh" or "Parrottown"? Or just "Parrot".

By the way, Jimmy, if you're still looking for your lost shaker of salt, I know where it is. It's up your ass, right next to your head.

Death Seems Heavy in the Air.

Nice post title, huh. But am I wrong? I mean, Terri Schiavo, the Pope, Frank Perdue. Of course, many other people have died in the last few days who will be mourned by only a few loved ones, and mourned as deeply. It's fitting that we should keep trying to understand death.

But how we live is more important than how we die, and that, to me, is the lesson in all this. And I think Frank, Terri, and John-Paul would agree.